Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Couch. On fire.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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