At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
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