please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Randomize
