We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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