my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
