he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Randomize
