Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
