After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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