you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
