Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
