You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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