she woke up with a sticky ear
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
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Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
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I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka