I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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