What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
