is your mom at the bar?
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
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