Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
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