I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
