it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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