Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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