She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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