Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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