The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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