I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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