Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
