thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
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