if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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