like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
