Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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