Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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