no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Randomize
