YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
