Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
You took a bar mat shot.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
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