Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I'm just crazy horny about you
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I'm too high and old for this...
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
