I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I'm like, not good at living.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
