They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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