For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
