we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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