All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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