I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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