smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
A+ Viking dick
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
