areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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