? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
