did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
No stitches, just platelets and will power
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
