just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
i just google imaged poop.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize