did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
thus making me awesome and them whores
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Randomize
