she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I think a kid would responsible me up
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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