My room smells like vodka and shame
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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