are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
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