Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize
