so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
